When love hurts…

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New beginnings and changes for the future are all around us as we enter a New Year… but what if they were never wanted.

When relationships break-down, friendships end it can feel like a loved one has died leaving us in a place of sadness, loss and can even feel like grief.

Our reaction to loss and our readjustment is an important and very individual process. However, once we make it through to the other side the experience can actually be rewarding and actually teach us a lot about ourselves.

When we go through a break-up it usually just takes time and maybe the love and support of others for us to find our feet and learn to walk again.
For some of us it’s not that simple. We can put on a brave face and pretend we’re over it, but the hurt and pain we feel is still there, maybe softening daily- but still there.

heartbreakFor a while there may even be the glimmer of hope for reconciliation but feelings can change once you’ve been hurt and trust and other issues begin to surface.

Overcoming this feeling of loss and all of the pain and hurt that goes with it can be difficult and not taking the experience – well the negative aspects- into the next relationship can be even harder and that’s if you can even bear to go into another relationship at all!

Yes …Love can hurt, stifle us and stop us in our tracks. But wouldn’t it be nice to just love freely- like you’ve never been hurt?
Wouldn’t it be nice to be one of those people who can just spend some time alone and then simply move on. Put it down to experience and in time even remain friends with their ex? (on second thoughts. ..) and get on with life!

If you’re still reading this, perhaps you know what I mean.

It might just be a case of looking in the mirror and asking yourself what part of what you are feeling is making it so painful and difficult to move on. Is it the rejection? All the compromises you made? The situation you’ve been left in? How worthless that person has made you feel?

If you realise that it comes down to how the separation has made you feel and it’s that feeling that’s difficult to overcome then read on…It does get easier and once we understand that our reactions amd feelings are usually a combination of  experience and how we feel about ourselves.

“Why can’t I just accept that I wasn’t right for them?”
“Why does it have to mean I’m not good enough/ ugly/ never going to find someone?”
“Why do I need someone to make me feel happy/ loved/ good about myself?”

These are the questions you could ask yourself but only once you’re truly ready for the answer.

Sometimes we have to look back before we can move forwards.

Here comes the plug…

Doing this kind of work on yourself using hypnotherapy can help to the deal with past and present issues in a gentle and explorative way. You can release yourself from old unhelpful behaviours and deal with current issues so that you don’t develop any more. Taking a look at your self-esteem and confidence issues can remedy so much in how you allow others to treat you and how you treat others. Looking for patterns in your experiences can also prepare you for  positive relationships in the future. You can even overcome bad experiences and memories and give yourself a fresh start in your  current/next relationship.

I see people go through divorces and break-ups and aside from wanting to give those who need it a huge hug I can see the ones who would benefit from the quick relief the hypnotherapy can bring.

For some of us it  just takes some time and a listening and comforting ear. Some of us could do with a little help to find our  ‘happy’ again and this is such a simple and life-changing tool.

Learning to love ourselves (again) makes it so much easier to love and in turn receive love from others.

If you would like more information feel free to call or text me on 07780801532 or email me on info@changeinyoutherapies.com

Isn’t it time to make that change?…d x

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